YOGA FOR THE REST OF US: BACK CARE BASICS

2007, $1.00, at Goodwill Superstore on San Fernando

First Impression: Barney’s Mom.

Second impression: I like you, you like me, my lower back is killing me.

It was with great joy that I was reunited with this DVD. You see, I had first tried it out more than a year ago and after working out to it once, my back felt like butter. But then I sent it to my Mom, thinking it might help her too, and hoping she would want to write a review of it. My Mom is hilarious. But my Mom is also super busy, bringing her licensed therapy dog to libraries to help kids with their reading.

Awwww!

Over the past year, whenever my back was hurting, I would pine for this DVD. I swore if I ever got my hot little hands on it, I would never let it out of my sight again! Well, I wished hard enough and another copy of this DVD found its way back to me via Goodwill. Dreams do come true.

Peggy Cappy leads us through a two-hour festival of ahhh in a creaky old wooden building. That’s right, this routine is two hours long. But where do you think you’re going? You can barely move. So listen to Peggy and get to work. She and her two friends demonstrate the poses on a rug with spiky flowers that symbolize the great pain that underlies everything you do.

With her soothing voice and her innocuous bob haircut, Peggy skillfully unties the Gordian knots that plague your back. The key is your hamstrings. They’re like a difficult co-worker. If they ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy. If you can release the tension in your hamstrings and your hips, you are halfway there already. Then you can finally get to stretching out those tight back muscles and stop walking around like a crooked man in a nursery rhyme.

The “For The Rest Of Us” in the title lets us know exactly what to expect. Do you want your yoga demonstrated by ordinary-looking people instead of models who look beautiful when they are angry? Do you want your workout to be free of any sort of musical accompaniment? Would you prefer it if your instructor eschewed any sort of namaste hoo-hah and got right to the stretchy-stretchy? Then, my friend, this is the yoga series for you.