Tag Archives: trendy

THE BIGGEST LOSER: 8 MINUTE BODY BLASTERS

2013, $2.99 (in the original shrink wrapper!), at Goodwill on Colorado, Eagle Rock

First Impression: Bob shows off his new tattoo sleeve.

Second Impression: While Dolvett plays “bet you can’t touch my elbow.”

You too can win at fitness with The Biggest Loser, eight minutes at a time.  Select which of the five, eight-minute routines you’d like to do, and in what order. (There’s seven routines in all if you include the warmup and cooldown, which is a must.)

This is another mix-and-match DVD menu that would just benefit from a “play all” function. You’ve already got your sneakers on. In for a penny, in for a pound of flesh.

It doesn’t say so anywhere on the packaging, but this is a tried-and-true interval workout. The trainers push us hard for thirty seconds, let us rest for ten, then move on to the next exercise.  Maybe it’s because I didn’t have my air conditioner turned on, but this one’s a sweater. Towards the end of the workout, Bob quips that “you should be in a pool of sweat right now,” and yes sir, he is correct!

Pro tip: have some air freshener handy to spray your workout space when you finish up. Deploying a fan near an open window wouldn’t hurt, either. And would it kill you to burn some incense?  You can become “smell-blind” to your household’s own particular set of odors, especially if you have pets, cook often, wear synthetic fabrics, or otherwise are a human being.

You will definitely feel the effects of this workout the next day, so be prepared. My obliques are pulverized, but check out that shoulder definition! Is that from one workout?  Also, I did not wake up with excruciating back pain per usual. I’m talking like spirit-crushing, Ramsey Snow-induced back pain. Did the workout alleviate my lumbago, or was it the way I stacked my pillows? I couldn’t tell you, but what I do know is, I should probably get a new mattress.

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