Tag Archives: under 30 minutes

BACK CARE YOGA FOR BEGINNERS WITH RODNEY YEE

2003, $1.99, at LA Road Thrift Store

First Impression: Rodney Yee doesn’t notice you noticing him.

Second Impression: He’s too busy wondering where in the world his shirt might have gotten to.

The DVD cover calls out a list of bad back habits, such as “sitting at the computer, driving to/from work, relaxing on the couch,” and might as well have added “zoning out while doomscrolling on your phone.” Never fear, Rodney Yee is here with the cure for what ails you.

What a coincidence! You know, when I do yoga on a deserted beach, I also bring a Mid-Century Modern chair with me.

Geez, Rodney. Buy that chair dinner first.

After Rodney gets uh, acquainted with his new friend, we begin a epic, 24-minute workout that takes us on a journey with a man, some sand, and the best seat in the house… all without leaving your own chair.

The routine does give a good approximation of stretches that you could do at your own desk. However, I would find the workout much more appealing if it was filmed on the set of Office Space, performed by average looking people in ill-fitting Business Casual.

Instead, Rodney Yee smugly demonstrates the poses in his tiny shorts, letting the shot pan over his perfectly toned body, objectifying him the way female fitness hosts usually have a camera pointed directly down their sports bra. We’ve come a long way, Baby.

Is he using a sheet of plywood instead of a yoga mat? Hard core.

There’s lots of bending over to grab our ankles, which is, fun fact, very difficult to do on a chair with wheels. I switch from my desk chair to my cat-oman. Since you didn’t ask, a cat-oman is a hollowed-out ottoman with a cat bed inside it. Do you have a small pet? Do you like to put your feet up?  You will love a cat-oman.

If you have tight legs or lower back, this foldy leg pose while leaning forward is a really good stretch.

Now, while we’re twisting around, Rodney recommends that we “soften the brain.”

That’s exactly what “They” want us to do. Don’t make me get my tin foil hat, Rodney Yee! 

After some chair-assisted Triangle Poses, Rodney gets down on his plywood to demonstrate spinal extensions and twists.

“Let your brain melt into the back of your skull,” he suggests. I pull my tin foil hat more firmly around my ears. Will I need to get more foil to make baked potatoes for Thanksgiving? Only time will tell.