YOGA BOOTY BALLET LIVE: CARDIO CABARET BURLESQUE STYLE

YBBCardioCabaretBurlesque

2005, $3.99, at Goodwill Superstore on San Fernando

First Impression: So this is the Yoga Booty Ballet that Aaron at work is always talking about.

Second Impression: Aaron’s like, “That’s a real thing? I was just stringing words together.”

The workout begins with the two instructors and their students running onto the exercise floor in Skittles-colored outfits and engaging in a series of hugs, which have been choreographed to seem spontaneous.

This routine is a kitchen-sinker, with a mishmash of moods to match the different exercise disciplines that inform it. We start being all “namaste” with some breathing in a cross-legged pose. Then the sassy horns kick in, and we slink our way up to our feet and mime taking off our elbow length gloves. “It’s burlesque, after all,” quip the hosts. After a campy cardio routine, we do some standing leg work in attitude and arabesque, finishing up in Goddess Pose while the teachers tell us to “Spread Love.”

The brunette instructor reminds me of Karen Allen. I keep expecting her to hold up the Medallion of Ra and scream at Indiana Jones, “I’m your goddamned partner!” while her bar burns to the ground.

The camera will sometimes linger on their bongo player, Ravi, whose secondary job is never to break eye contact with the bouncing cleavage of the dancer nearest him. But lone male student Randy steals the show with his glassy-eyed head bobble, working moves like Coquettish Kitty, Good Ship Lollipop, and Knock Your Hat Off. Personally, my favorite move is Put On Your Thigh High, which I enjoy demonstrating to friends at parties.

This DVD is easy to follow, and fun to do! It’s so much fun that I would have friends over to try the routine with me if my living room were bigger than an Uggs shoebox. I imagine the live classes in their Los Angeles studio are really enjoyable, except for the part where strangers would want to hug me.

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